Monday, January 11, 2010

??? Purity ???

Okay ladies. This is a serious, thought provoking one and I need some input.

My girls are growing up. Sometimes I don't know whether to be joyful or sad about that. Mostly I'm joyful. They are growing into amazing young ladies and I'm privileged to be called their Mom. I also try to just embrace every season of life that God gives me. My season to have babies is over, so rather than mourning that, I choose to embrace this season. The girls and I have had a couple of the dreaded talks. Neither of which were as hard as I had imagined and honestly were better than I would have ever dreamed. The first was a brief one about puberty and what it is. It was very basic, but I wanted them to expect some changes. That one was pretty matter of fact and kind of funny. The second was a little more specific and I married what would happen with their bodies, with what needed to be happening spiritually to prepare to be a wife and mother. We all cried and laughed. It was great and I was so thankful that I got to share that with them, that they didn't hear it from anyone else first and it was a memory made and a sweet one at that.

I am planning to take the girls away for a weekend for their birthday this year. Thanks to a friends recommendation I will be purchasing a Passport2Purity kit and using that for our weekend. I'm very excited about it!

Here is where the question part of this post comes in. I have a great Mom and I am extremely close to her, but she is not the one that explained puberty or purity to me. So, I feel like I'm winging it here (of course that is much of what parenting is) and wanted to hear from all of you women, what did your Mom do well and what do you wish she had done differently, concerning teaching you about purity and for you Moms that already have grown up daughters, what did you do that you think worked and what (if anything) would you do differently? I'm hoping for lots of great insight hear and I know their are some very wise women that read my blog on occasion, so let me hear your insight. Please, please, please........


The New June said...

Aside from conversations ith my Momma (AND my Daddy- who continued to remind me that I was worth more than what most offered) I also read a lot of books on the subject. "Authentic Beauty" by Leslie Ludy is fabulous, as are all the books written by the Ludys.

Good luck and God bless, I'm sure y'all will have a blast!

Denise :) said...

I like to teach abstract concepts, like purity, with concrete images. I used an exquisitely wrapped package--beautiful paper, ribbons, bows, the works--to represent purity. The long and short of it was that with each example of impure living (thoughts, words, deeds--including physical purity, television watched, books read, the whole gambit) I tore at the wrapping paper or messed up the ribbon or bow. By the time we had finished discussing impurities, the package was not not all that pretty anymore. It really impacted especially my daughter, who didn't want to be giving herself to her husband, all tattered and picked apart. There's a lot more you can do with it, I'm just sharing the basics.

We also talked about how the "pretty present", when given to our spouse at the proper time, stayed beautiful (because we don't lose our purity in God's eyes when we get married) because really we're the brides of Christ, and we want to keep ourselves pure and untattered for our Bridegroom!

What was most significant to my children was being able to share that it wasn't what *I* wanted, that it was what *God* wanted. To be able to show them in God's word what He has to say about it. And as children of God, they wanted to be pleasing to Him. I feel sorry for parents (like my own) who don't have that higher authority to fall back on!

Hugs! :)

cahanbury said...

I didn't grow up in a Christian household and I don't really remember being told anything about saving myself for marriage or anything like that. I definitely knew about safe sex. But really the best thing my mom did was create an environment where I felt comfortable telling her things and asking her questions.

The Arnold Family said...

Honey I don't know. I was the least pure person I knew. My parents wanted me to be pure of course, and gave me the ring and everything...but I wasn't interested. I think it's important to have a Daddy's affection, consistency and boundaries. All of which I am confident you give your children. And none of which answer your question for the weekend away! Ha, sorry. Let us know how it goes. Tylee is younger, and I am always looking for advice and wisdom.