Lover, Companion - Your first ministry is to your husband. Do not neglect him. Remain well kept and pleasing in appearance as an honor to him. Submit your flesh and emotions to the control of the Holy Spirit. Honor and respect him, compliment him. Be the physical lover he needs.
a. 1 Corinthians 7:3-5
3The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. 4The wife's body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband's body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife. 5Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.
b. Titus 2:3-5
3Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. 4Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, 5to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.
My Notes: Guess I'll address these in the order in which they are posted.
~ For YEARS I put many, many things before my husband, including my children, my extended family and my church. Thank the Lord a VERY wise woman in our church corrected me and became a mentor to me and it CHANGED my life. If you're not putting him first now.....do it! It will change your marriage.
~I've been a stay at home Mom for 12 1/2 year and like most people my body changed after I had my babies, so none of my pre-baby clothes fit. That made it very easy to fall into the sweats, jeans, t-shirts rut. When I had to go somewhere nice I would dress nice, but around the house I was frumpy. A few years ago the Lord really convicted me of that. Men are VERY visual and I could not complain about my husband not being as affectionate as I would like, not telling my I was beautiful, not desiring me (he really was doing those things, but I was very insecure) if I wasn't trying to be attractive to him. We cannot expect to woo them before we are married then stop when we get married. So, I began to really work on being attractive to him and it made a huge difference! I try to wear more feminine clothes when I'm home. Nothing fancy, but shirts and pants with a more feminine cut. I dress nicer when we are going anywhere together. Anybody wonder why I'm almost 34 and have long blonde hair??? He LOVES it! Make the effort, it's well worth it!
~The last one is rather personal, so I'll try to be discreet. 1st - Pray about ALL aspects of your marriage, including the physical ones. If he desires more than you do, then pray for that desire, etc. 2nd - Don't say no. Meet his physical needs. You may be tired, you may not want too, but in the end will you really regret it? He wants to feel desired by you, too. Turning him down is a blow to his ego. You can do it...